


keenest lustre glow’d

by Amazingspaceship



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Sburb Session, F/F, Humanstuck, Like, Vampires, explicit content, theres references to a one night stand but no
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-08
Updated: 2018-01-08
Packaged: 2019-03-02 12:06:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,488
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13317756
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amazingspaceship/pseuds/Amazingspaceship
Summary: The morning after is... awkward. To say the least."Is - is that blood?""No," says the vampire in Rose's kitchen, "I was just eating a beet."





	keenest lustre glow’d

The morning after is... awkward. To say the least.

"Is - is that blood?"

"No," says the vampire in Rose's kitchen, "I was just eating a beet."

Rose eyes the red stain suspiciously. She's only just now stumbled into the kitchen and is seriously considering stumbling right back out. "Are you sure? Because that looks an awful lot like a bloodstain."

The vampire dabs the corner of her mouth with a napkin. Daintily. She's reading a book, probably something from Rose’s own bookshelf. Craning her neck confirms it - the vampire is reading a paranormal romance, one of Rose’s favorites. Rose irrationally hates her for her good taste. "I assure you I was merely having breakfast,” says the vampire. “I found a few beets in your garden-"

"Hold on," Rose plops herself down, across the table from the vampire (who is now licking beet juice off her fingers) and crosses her arms, in what she hopes to be an intimidating manner. "Why were you in my garden."

"I was gardening, of course," says the vampire (she really should start calling her something other than "vampire," but Rose is honestly scared to ask her name.) "I planted some hydrangeas out by the fence, which I think will look nice with -"

Rose thumps her head down on the table and groans. The vampire is making herself at home. "This can't get any worse. Please tell me that all you've done this morning is eat beets and snoop around in my garden."

"Well," says the vampire, a tad sheepishly, "I did meet your mother. She's a lovely woman."

Oh no.

Rose had once, years ago, given a talk to some bored creative writing students down at the local high school. After the talk there were questions, and one of the students had raised her hand and asked Rose about her inspirations for her second novel- specifically, the inspiration behind the ghost character.

Rose had talked about the manor, and about her mother's funeral, and about how, some days, she swore she could see her mother's spirit, wandering the halls in that aimless way she did when she was alive.

That was years ago, and Rose feels that way more than ever.

Case in point.

"Rosie!" Rose's mother drapes two ethereal arms around her daughter's neck in a cheap facsimile of a hug. "You gotta introduce me to your new lady friend!" Roxy leans down to whisper conspiratorially in Rose's ear. "She's pretty hot for a dead chick."

Rose thumps her head on the table again. Why is she, of all people, the beacon for supernatural entities in the family? Why couldn't this happen to Dave? It was bad enough when ghosts started showing up on her doorstep, why now vampires? What’s next, werewolves? "Oh my god. I can't deal with this sober, I need a drink."

"Mmm," hums the vampire, turning a page.

\--

Rose roots through her cabinets and, upon finding her emergency bourbon, pours herself a generous amount. After some thought, she extends the bottle towards the vampire.

“No thanks,” she says. “I don’t drink.”

Rose, Roxy and the vampire sit around her breakfast table. Well, for a given value of sit; Rose’s mother floats, and the vampire lounges.

It feels weirdly, bizarrely… normal. Supernatural shenanigans aside, there’s nothing exceedingly unusual going on. It’s like any other awkward morning-after that Rose has experienced, except for, of course, the vampire part.

“Funny,” says Rose, “last night you drank plenty.”

This, finally, gets a rise out of the vampire. Rose didn’t know the undead could blush. “That was - that was strictly out of necessity! It was nothing personal!”

“On the contrary, I’d argue that last night was plenty personal. Especially the part where you did that thing with your hips -”

The Vampire blushes like a schoolgirl. “You are being intentionally aggravating, and I don’t appreciate the insinuation that -”

“Is this something you normally do?” Rose interrupts. “Going home with strange women in bars and then feasting on their sweet lifeblood? Do you normally spend your Friday nights scouting out potential, shall we say, ‘donors?’”

“I feel like you are misconstruing my intentions, and I would like to clarify -”

“Really, because I feel like your intentions were quite -”

“If you’d please just -”

‘OH MY GOD,” Rose’s mom yells from the kitchen, “EITHER KISS OR SHUT UP.”

There is an awkward silence.

Rose runs a finger around the rim of the bottle. What kind of small talk does one make here? Should she apologize? Should she ask the vampire to leave? Is there a tactful way to say ‘hey, when you said you were a vampire last night and I said that you should drink my blood, I thought you were joking??? And then when you actually did it I played along, and I’m honestly not sure why, and I’m sorry???’

“...What’s your name,” she says finally, because there isn’t really anything better.

The vampire blinks. “I - Kanaya. It’s Kanaya. Kanaya Maryam.”

“Nice to meet you, Kanaya,” Rose says, and holds out her hand- a peace offering.

Kanaya hesitates only a moment before taking it.

\--

They spend the rest of the morning in a silence that borders on companionable. The sun filters in through the kitchen windows, filling the whole room up with light. It doesn’t seem to affect Kanaya, though, which raises the question- how much of a traditional vampire is the one in Rose’s kitchen?

“You’re not affected by sunlight,” Rose observes. “Is there anything else about you which is contrary to common depictions of vampires? Do you enjoy garlic, perhaps? Are you unperturbed by crosses?”

“I don’t know where humans get their ideas about vampires,” Kanaya complains. “Vampirism is a perfectly biological phenomenon.”

“You’re not even a little bit magic?”

“No.”

“Maybe just a tad?”

Kanaya rolls her eyes. “This is a ridiculous line of questioning. There is no such thing.”

“Hey, magic is real!”

“Magic is fake as shit.”

Rose inclines her head towards the living room, where through the doorway the ghost of her mom can be seen watching reruns on the television.

“...Point,” says the vampire.

There is a knock at the door.

Rose opens to a scowling face and a shock of unruly black hair. The boy on her doorstep looks like he hasn’t slept in weeks, and the bags under his eyes are so deep that they could be used to carry groceries. His facial expression is one of concentrated aggravation. If anger had a physical form, this would be it. “Are you Lalonde?” he demands.

“Depends on who's asking.”

“Me, dipshit.” He crosses his arms. ‘I’m here to pick up Kanaya.”

“You - oh.” Rose frowns. “She didn’t say someone was coming to pick her up.”

“Maybe my existence isn’t the most salient topic for pillow talk. Imagine that!” The scowl, if anything, gets deeper. “Is she here or not? I just drove two fucking hours to get here and I’d very much like to collect my friend and leave, thankyouveryfuckingmuch.”

“Oh, Karkat.” Kanaya slips around Rose and leans with her hip against the doorframe. “I didn’t expect you so soon.”

“Well I’m here right the fuck now. Are you ready to go yet, or what?” Karkat jangles a set of car keys. “I’m late for work.”

“I’ll - I’ll be along,” Kanaya says. “Just - wait in the car or something.”

Karkat rolls his eyes, but slouches off to comply. Kanaya turns to Rose, and purses her lips..

Rose takes the moment to study her. Kanaya is six feet tall, immaculate and graceful, and is somehow easily flustered. She has dark skin and green eyes and Rose realizes, suddenly, that she is beautiful. She isn't the ‘immortal being of sinister beauty’ that her romance novels would describe her as, but she is instead a genuinely beautiful woman. And, weird vampire manners aside, a not altogether too unpleasant woman.

Not bad for a one night stand, Rose decides. Not bad at all.

“I have to go,” Kanaya says, “but I just wanted to say that - I’m sorry, about the blood thing. In case that weirded you out. And, also - I had a nice time.”

“I did too,” Rose says. “The blood thing notwithstanding.”

Kanaya smiles, with just a hint of fang. She leans in close, plants a quick kiss on Rose’s cheek, presses the book into her hands, and absconds.

Rose blinks. She reaches a hand up to where Kanaya had kissed her, and her fingers come away caked with green lipstick.

There is a note stuck between the pages of the book - Rose pries it out and reads it.

Rose-

I Know You Were Probably Weirded Out By Me Being A Vampire And Everything

And I Understand If Your Answer To The Following Question Is No

But I Would Not Be Opposed To Doing This Again

555-726-8271

Call Me

-Kanaya Maryam

So it turns out Rose’s life is just a shitty paranormal romance novel.

She’s maybe okay with that.

**Author's Note:**

> Born from an idea [Littlemapleleaf](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Littlemapleleaf/pseuds/Littlemapleleaf) gave me a long time ago. Title comes from the poem [The Vampyre](https://www.poets.org/poetsorg/poem/vampyre) by John Stagg


End file.
